Through a child’s eyes the world has little faults. To be simply living and breathing and laughing can make up for a kaleidoscope of troubles and hardships. I always reflect on this when life gets a little overwhelming for me. And believe me, I reflect a lot these days. We often somehow drift very far from our beginning, those roots that once kept us grounded in the pastel-lit summer breeze of our childhood- eventually sways away and we begin trying to fit jagged puzzle pieces together, a mold and creation of what we hope ends up looking like our ‘self’. It’s funny really if you sit and think about it, hell, you probably become too involved in your own mind and drive yourself crazy (much like someone I know, guilty.)- but I’ve been trying to make this ‘puzzle’ a swift trial-and-error kinda’ ordeal, rearranging what’s ‘important’ and what ‘I need to be doing’. Hence, my absence for the past bit on my lovely blog-o-space. I’ve been writing lists and marching around the internet trying to ‘get things done’, and half the time I end up realizing I’m not even completely sure what I’ve actually gotten done. Or, even better, what I’m doing. I’m also a list kinda’ girl, and if you are like me, it’s like random tiny notebooks take an Aladdin-type aura and swarm around me at all hours of the day, some filed with tiny to-do’s, other’s with, like, hilarious ten-step plans for me to be able to sip some sort of iced tea in a decent sized backyard that has flowing assortments of lemon, orange, and avocado trees, and I’m in some marvelous, flowing, white attire practicing ‘enlightenment’ and meditation. Also, I’ve helped the world in some decent, awesome, way and I have no worries because I am able to give back to the world and I get to write all the time about people’s awesome lives as a real big girl job- so everything is peaceful and lovely. It’s like, can that just happen? Ah, my life. Someday.
Anyhow, that’s where I’ve been loves. Fishing for my dreams. Oh, being 23… I’m hoping I’m not the only craze in this gen’? It felt appropriate to write today about this, especially in light of ‘throwback thursday’, and my already (somewhat) jaded self above (haha).
I’m slowly trying not to be a human cartoon, with all the running and feeling like I’ve past the same scenery…23 times. I think if we all admit it- it’s a part of the whole ‘molding self’ ordeal. Like a right of passage or some way the Universe gets a laugh when it gets bored being so old and such. So I’ll hand it to him, half the time my life does slightly feel like a comedy, but perhaps we just have to take it as a good thing, and laugh with it. Fitting puzzle pieces together swiftly isn’t really working for me, so I figure I’ll just keep writing about the trail and error and lovely things, and somehow everything will simply be okay.
So I’m smelling the roses and keeping up just doing what I love to do, and with that you can’t go wrong. I was actually thinking about this very statement last week when I was visiting my grandmother’s home at the beach- and I figured I would share. She passed away about a year ago, but she was one of those people that always made you feel like life, indeed, wasn’t falling apart. She was born in 1920, so I always figured her advice was hierarchy to all the rest, wouldn’t you? Especially when I first had my ‘beginning-life-crisis’ in the very beginning of my twenties. She was always a big believer in things working out, and keeping light on ‘the little things’. So, a couple weeks ago I posted this from a picture I took while walking around one day. The quote I thought of just kinda’ stuck, and ever since I’ve been trying to really pay attention to everything around me because I think we are given little signs everyday, to show us we really do have a purpose, and someone is always there. Anyhow, it’s always hard going to South Carolina knowing she won’t be there to cheer me up or give me wonderful life advice, but I was sitting in the sun one day- stressing and worrying particularly at that very moment-and suddenly noticed her favorite roses were blooming in one particular spot. Right about that time, a red cardinal flew in right beneath them…I scrambled around quietly like a spazz for a chance to get a picture- and I got it just before he flew off. It didn’t end up being the clearest shot, but I caught it, and that was enough. Needless to say, even in its somewhat blurriness, it will have a lovely place on a wall somewhere in my home sometime in the very near future. I figured with something so ironic and beautiful (story and all), it has to have a more permanent space in my life.
So, maybe you’re in my boat, or something like it- so it’s a nice reminder to share with you, loves; we’re always apart of something bigger, than ourselves, than our worries, than the things that maybe bring us down sometimes. So, I suppose this post is kind of a kickoff to summer posts, and thoughts, and fashion, and food, and faith? (who knows, anything goes), and ponders, and all sorts of loveliness. From me…then, and now.